Merriam-Webster’s word of the year in 2023 was “Authentic” and I think the dark horse candidate for winning their “word of the year” in 2024 might be “Bedwetters.” The Biden campaign and many in the Democratic establishment have been shaming those Dems who’ve been overly anxious since the debate debacle a couple of weeks ago – they call these nervous Nellie’s the “bedwetting brigade.” The word has become so pervasive that a pediatric urologist wrote this recent blog post about how misused this word is in our current political lexicon.
Okay, I’ll admit it, I’ve recently become an Authentic Bedwetter. On my flight to Iceland, I was so sound asleep, I wet myself. Not just a little, but a whole gusher. Thankfully, I was sleeping in airline blankets that I sure hope will be laundered. I told the immigration officer in Reykjavik and anyone else who cared to listen that I’d spilled water on myself. Ever have an experience like this? It reminds me of when I was four and my dad and I were waiting in the long Matterhorn line at Disneyland. I had to pee really badly, but I didn’t want us to lose our place in line so I didn’t tell Dad I couldn’t hold it any longer. And, just as we were about to get into our Matterhorn sled, I leaked all over myself and the ground embarrassing both of us. No Matterhorn for me.
Some of my current challenges relate to my two prostate surgeries and 36 radiation sessions in the bladder region. I’ve been practicing my Kegels and even wore diapers for weeks after my catheters were removed, so this is not new territory for me, nor my contemporaries. Approximately one in ten American men have urinary incontinence with rates rising greatly in men over 60 years old. This isn’t exclusive to men. In Japan, they sell more adult diapers than they do baby diapers.
So, I decided to do a little sleuthing and found that there’s three kinds of incontinence (oh, Chip, this TMI!). No need to keep reading, but as a public service for all of us bedwetters (a term that’s been applied to a lot of Democrats lately when it comes to Joe Biden), I wanted to share this info:
Stress urinary incontinence (SUI) occurs when physical movement or activity — such as coughing, laughing, sneezing, or heavy lifting — puts pressure or stress on a man’s bladder. I’ve heard lots of men and women say, “I laughed so hard I peed in my pants.”
Urge incontinence, also known as overactive bladder (OAB), is diagnosed when a man has an overwhelming need to urinate (gotta go, gotta go!) that may prevent reaching the toilet in time. I saw this on my flight home from Iceland. A guy made a beeline for the restroom knocking over a flight attendant. Of course, he exited the bathroom with a big wet spot on his trousers that he tried to shield with his Wall Street Journal.
And, then, there’s Mixed incontinence. A man has mixed incontinence if he leaks urine when he sneezes, coughs, laughs, exercises, or lifts something heavy, AND leaks urine after a sudden urge to urinate, while he sleeps, after drinking water, or hearing or touching water. You’ve won the lottery if this is how you experience your need to pee.
Here’s the good news (for me): I don’t have this issue very often. So, if you’re sitting on a couch with me, sharing a hot tub, or sitting on my lap when I’m Santa at Christmas, don’t worry, we’ll be fine. But, you’re welcome to call me Dr. Leaky.
-Chip
P.S. Tomorrow’s post was going to be “Everything I Learned About Life I Learned in Last Friday’s Colonoscopy” based upon my recent experience, but my wise editors have told me only allocated one graphic bodily blog post per week, so you’re saved. 🙂