The first half of our life is about accumulating. The second half is about editing. So, if you’re going to say yes to something in midlife or later, it’s best to balance it with a no to something else.
Michael is a friend of MEA who has written one of the bestselling books of this century around the topic of coaching and asking catalytic questions (“The Coaching Habit” has 15,000 Amazon reviews). He’s also a consummate plate-spinner, learning to regularly welcome the new by saying goodbye to the old. Here’s a collection of questions he suggests we consider asking when we’re welcoming something new to our lives:
- What projects do you need to abandon or postpone?
- What meetings will you no longer attend?
- What resources do you need to divert to the Yes?
- When it comes to people, what expectations do you need to manage? What relationships will you let wither?
- What habits do you need to break?
- What old stories or dated ambitions do you need to update?
- What beliefs about yourself do you need to let go of?
I like to think of my overstuffed life as a late-night disco with treasures of lovely music, delicious aesthetics, and inspiring conversations inside. Of course, I also imagine a burly bouncer at the door. You might say the disco is my Yes and the bouncer is my No. And when my life is getting particularly pinball-y (feeling like a reactive ball in a pinball machine), I post a second bouncer at the door.
Which of Michael’s questions above most resonates with you?
MEA is fortunate to have Michael Bungay Stanier coming June 3-8 in Baja to teach a workshop on “How to Find Your Next Big Thing.” There are still spaces left to come on down to our paradise on the beach and imagine what’s next for you. This is a great workshop if you’re stuck and paralyzed. Additionally, Michael and I will be doing an online fireside chat tomorrow – you’re all welcome join. Register here: https://bit.ly/49Cq4YM
– Chip