From a young age, we’re taught to be maximizers. If you work hard, you’ll succeed. If you treat your girlfriend well, she’ll love you. If you invest well, you’ll grow your wealth. There’s both logic and an illusion built into this premise.
The logic is built on “a priori” thinking or assumed principles. Literally, it means from “what comes first,” you can presume what will happen next. But, as we know, all kinds of things get in the way of this logic—whether it’s a cheating partner or a worldwide recession.
The opposite of a priori is “a posteriori,” which describes ideas based on experience. It’s less based on logic and more based on wisdom. And as we all know, as we get older, we move from logic to wisdom. At least that’s the idea.
This brings me back to the sentence that started this post, uttered by a wise friend in his mid-70s. He’s no longer a maximizer running multiple marathons annually. He’s now a satisficer, satisfied with what’s good enough and what matters most as we get older. Best of all, he’s happier as well.
While it’s true that as we get older, some of our options narrow, especially the physical ones, fortunately, many new possibilities open up, which often include those we’ve neglected earlier in life: a deep connection with a family member or close friend, a hobby we’ve always wanted to pursue, a passion or curiosity that lights us up but we didn’t have time for it when we were in our juggling phase (our 30s, 40s, and 50s).
What matters most to you as you get older? And how can you consciously curate your life to invest more into this from now on?
And what if you knew you only had three more visits with an older relative of yours? How would you treat those experiences differently?
– Chip