A journalist in 1916 asked John D. Rockefeller, the world’s first billionaire: “How much is enough?” JDR answered: “Just a little bit more.” Any financial expert or mathematician could have easily calculated that Rockefeller’s wealth afforded him the most extravagant lifestyle imaginable. He had the Math of Enough, but he was missing the Mindset of Enough.
Western culture aligns with Rockefeller’s mindset; we believe more is always better, regardless of what we already possess. I have to confess, it’s been the story of my life and the lives of many of my clients. As my income/wealth has soared over the past 20 years to a level I couldn’t have imagined in my youth, my mind relentlessly asserts that higher numbers will bring greater power, freedom, and happiness. I have repeatedly fallen for this mental fabrication, only to look back with sadness and disappointment at these unfulfilled promises.
The mind excels at coming up with new “mores” to satiate the wanting mind. We may find ourselves fantasizing about more wealth, work status, party invitations, as well as a grander home, and a more fit body. But this constant grasping causes us to move through life propelled by a sense of inadequacy, driven by fear and scarcity rather than purpose, distracting us from recognizing our intrinsic worth. We have a choice to live hunched forward, oblivious to the magnificence of our current life, or to fully enjoy this cup of coffee, this spreadsheet, this conversation.
What finally helped me undo my allegiance to the voice of “more”?
- I began allowing myself to fully experience – rather than suppress – the pain of the pursuit of more.
- Through meditation practice, I learned that it’s more effective to befriend, rather than oppose, the beliefs you’re trying to change. I developed a daily practice of creating space to welcome and get curious about the voices of: “I’m not enough, I don’t have enough, I don’t do enough.” This counter-intuitive approach helped to lessen my fear of the thoughts, and soften my self-judgment, and the allure of “more” became less seductive.
- A third catalyst was an experience with a client: ”If you can double my money, I’ll retire, I’ll feel free…” he said. Five years later, when his wealth had indeed doubled to a substantial amount (even by Bay Area standards), I invited him to my office to review his new financial situation. However, instead of appearing happy, he seemed stressed and solemn. He said: “I’ve thought about this… I need one more doubling to be really free.” This was an eye-opening moment for me!
I began retraining my mind, slowly softening decades of conditioning. The Buddha said, and neuroscience later corroborated, that what we frequently ponder becomes the inclination of the mind. Armed with this insight, I began consciously acknowledging ordinary moments of ‘enough’ at work and at home: My conversation with a colleague was enough, the mediocre weather is enough, my furniture/car is enough. And my meditation practice allowed me to fully experience the sublime quality of ‘enough’ – a quality only available in the present (not the future).
You might wonder: Isn’t “enough” limiting? “What if I want to run for political office, win a marathon, mitigate climate change, start a company, write my memoir, or learn to surf? I don’t want to simply retire to a hammock.” This is where the power of the “enough” principle can’t be overstated. You can pursue your goals, but your basic happiness no longer hinges on specific outcomes. What’s more, there’s a growing body of research that suggests that the confidence and ease that stems from an ‘enough’ mindset actually enhances our ability to enter a flow state, create results, and flourish. Enough is the gateway to abundance.
Now, let’s explore the Math of Enough. There’s anxiety, for many of us, when we look at our numbers. What if the numbers reveal that I should be spending a lot more or a lot less? Ignorance is (temporarily) bliss. Here’s a simplified rule of thumb that I follow: multiply the total of your investment and retirement assets by 4% – 5% – that’s roughly the amount you could withdraw annually to fund your lifestyle. If you have $1 million, you could withdraw approximately $40,000 – $50,000 the first year, and an inflation bump each successive year. This amount combined with any earned or other income (such as social security) sums up to your total available spending. *1
Then ask yourself: “Can I support a healthy lifestyle with this level of spending?” If not, you might need to earn supplemental income or creatively figure out how to live well with the money you have. There’s power in knowing the numbers.
This exercise inspired some of my clients to develop strategies they couldn’t have imagined previously. For example, one client moved to Bali for 3 months each year and rented out her house to lower her living expenses. Once we have the math, our mindsets are more receptive and confident about shaping our brains towards enough. The converse is true too; once we shift from more to the mindset of enough, we’re more open to trusting the math of our finances and more receptive to ways of making our numbers work.
When we marry the Mindset of Enough with the Math of Enough both are strengthened.
*1 This calculation is based on living to age 100 and having investment /retirement assets invested in a diverse portfolio with more equities than bonds.
Shedding the inherited belief that “I don’t have enough,” or “I’m not enough,” or that “more is always better,” has widened the aperture of my mind. It’s truly transformative, a game-changer. The earlier we begin cultivating this mindset, the sooner we’ll reap its benefits. Today is the best day to embrace Enough!
-Spencer
Spencer Sherman (MBA, CFP®) is a leading financial advisor, author, public speaker, founder and former CEO of Abacus, a values-driven financial consulting firm managing more than $3 billion in assets, and an MEA alum. A New York native now living in California, Spencer shares his innovative mindfulness-based approach to money and financial planning via his quarterly retreats, books, online courses, and speaking engagements. He has taught at Spirit Rock Meditation Center, NYU, Sounds True, Insight Meditation Society, and Mindwell, and has been a corporate speaker at Meta and Charles Schwab. https://www.spencer-sherman.com/.